[A Whole Carnival of Crazy]
I love the things that we should fearPlaying with a Player
2008-04-01
Guess who showed up at my door yesterday afternoon?!!! No, not that guy! Hmmmmm... lets think of the possibilities, for a moment. It could have been any number of interesting people from my life's saga. I'll give you a hint, it's a guy! Okay.... I'll stop fucking with you. It was the guy from last June.
I know what you are thinking. "What guy from last June?" I'll just call him "El Gallo Buenísimo", mostly because I think it's a funny way to describe him. You may remember that he owes me quite a bit of money. Oh yeah.... that guy. Yeah..... I've had a crush on him for quite some time now. He called a couple of weeks back when I was sick. I missed his call. I never expected to see him again. I was surprised, to say the least.
I've been playing quite a bit of WOW the past week. I was up all night and went to bed at noon! When my son woke me up to tell me that some guy was at the door, I had only been sleeping for about 4 hours. I got up and went to the door in my pajama pants and a sweat shirt, my hair all disheveled. I was surprised to see El Gallo standing there! He looked cute as ever and we chit chatted for a few minutes before I became way too self conscious to continue. I had to go put on some clothes and brush my hair. I made him stay outside, as the house is STILL an enormous mess! I went out and we talked for 2 hours! He's in a bit of trouble and because of that trouble he is having financial difficulties. I'm sure I have already expressed how he "earns" a living. I am not all that sympathetic to his troubles, but I do hope that things work out more in his favor than not. So I am assuming that he is here to "borrow" more money. I know that I am not entirely wrong on that point. So, we talk and I fill him in on my current arrangement. He tells me that he's been separated from his wife for a little while now. They are living apart and because of that, he is in town daily to shuttle children between households, schools and activities. He tells me that he's been thinking about me lately, he's been horny. I just laugh at that. He knows how I feel about him. Like I said before, I am not trick to figure out. I say what I like and what I want. I like him and I want him. I tell him about my lack of sex life now that I am a full time parent. I let him know that I DO NOT parade men in and out of my son's life, so I am uncomfortable bringing men home to "play". He understands. I don't know why he thought it was okay to show up at my house, after owing me money for 9 months, and just expect me to hop all over it. Then again, he knows that it is something I really want to do. He was a bit disappointed that we couldn't just get down to business.
I like this guy. I always have. He's a bullshitter, smooth talking con artist; not unlike my ex, only better. He can have an intelligent, grown up conversation and instantly flip to unabashed flirting and then back again, seamlessly. (also like my ex) I love it! He can make me blush, it is hard to do that to me. He tells me things that he probably shouldn't. I don't know why, but I'm cool so I assume it's easy. I see what he's doing and how he is trying to manipulate things. I play his game. I let him make the rules and then I bend them. I know that he is interested in me. I guess we'll have to see to what extent and purpose. Everyone needs a friend like me. Guys like El Gallo know that and use it to their benefit. I'm okay with that for now. I want to have some fun that isn't too serious.
Not to worry. I am being cautious. He is a criminal, charming as he may be. He is a married man, single as he may act. He is a product of an environment that our society creates for the children of poor Hispanic immigrants. It's not an excuse, but it is understandable how he arrived at where he is and the attitude that he has about it. I don't know if it is a blessing or a curse for me, that I am like this. I do this thing where I look past the undesirable and disagreeable things about a person and look at who they are, really, behind all the bullshit that life piles on us all. I can't help it. I do it with everyone I meet and talk with a bit. I always want to get down to what makes us what we are. I tend to get myself a fairly eclectic group of friends. Now I am wondering how this "friendship" fits into the whole scheme of things. I really believe that he is testing the waters to see where he stands and what he can get. I hope that he just thinks I'm cool and wants someone to kick it with. I like him though and I can see myself becoming good friends with him if he wants to.
We planned to meet this afternoon. He suggested that we go to a hotel and have sex. I am not sure that is going to happen. I played coy though. I am prepping, just in case I decide to do that. He got fresh with me in his car in my driveway in broad daylight! He kissed me, too! We all know how I've been feeling about that! He's a damn good kisser, definitely in my top three! He has a good sense of humor. I don't feel like I have to dumb things down for him or watch out for his feelings. It is so nice to be able to communicate like that. I like him a lot. He is so different than I am, with a very different outlook and values. It's interesting to spend time with people that can present a totally different view of the same world. I hope that he really is interested in cultivating a friendship. I would like to make him my lover for a little while! I'm skeptical though. He's a player for sure! I am not down for being played right now. I can play his game for a while and find out though!
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